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I Think I Get How Weddings are Stressful ...

January 20th, 2016 at 06:30 pm

First off - thank you everyone for your comments on my 24 hour post. Ya'll made me blush. Smile

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So .. last night I talked with my mom to go over some of the wedding stuff. I told her I was planning on asking Uncle J to officiate. She told me that I better be prepared that I'd be expected to pay for Uncle and Aunt J's expenses.

I was like, "What!!" I'd planned on giving him something like $100 as a thank you, but not paying for two plane tickets and a hotel room!

So .. I call my Aunt N (the one paying for my dress.) She tells me that couldn't be further from the truth. That Uncle J is honored that I want him to do it (she'd told him) but that he might have a problem with the date.

So .. I call Uncle J. Talk to him about being the officiant. He then tells me about having a flight to Egypt on April 26 - not back til June. Aunt J is going to be in Egypt at that time too. (Yes, both of their names begin wtih J. They were high school sweethearts. Too cute.)

So ... I very reluctantly figured out that maybe April 17 would work. He reminded me that was Aunt N's birthday. Also, Grandma was having some friends from Singapore fly into LAX she wants to see.

So ... I ask Uncle J if him being here on the 24th would be too close to leaving for Egypt. He said he was more than happy to do it.

Whew!

Now I'm waiting to hear back from my brother if that weekend will be okay for him. He's a bit preoccupied right now though. So who knows when I'll hear back.

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Can I say how much I don't like Amazon's registry? The results when searching are abysmal! And I haven't figured out how to put things in there that don't come up in the search results (like for say example - different colors of the item you want!)

Supposedly there's a universal option - but I haven't gotten that to work yet. Mr FT however is able to get in to the registry and add stuff from his computer. So that way we can both work on it when we have time.

(I haven't started a Target or Bed Bath Beyond one yet - am hoping to figure out the universal thing so only have one registry to work with!)

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The last two days at work were very stressful. In fact, yesterday I went to my supervisor and asked her how bad it would be if I asked to be relieved of helping one certain person. Help which is NOT part of my job description.

Apparently this person also had gone to my supervisor. She was frustrated with me as well.

So ... today we had a meeting. I don't know if it was the stress of everything, overtiredness, or just utter frustration ... but I embarrassed myself by crying! Ugh! I hate that.

Once the tears start, it's very hard to get them to stop. And then it's hard for me to talk. (Name something that drives Mr FT up the wall ... Smile )

I acknowledged my part in it (not being as careful as I should be in double checking the work output) and we figured out how to maybe make it work better.

We'll see I guess.

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So ... between my mom, grandma and aunt, I am being given $2500 towards wedding expenses. That's (hopefully) going to be more than 1/2 the cost.

So ... I have no clue how to word the invitations.

Mr FT bio parents are both dead, and he has an almost non-existant relationship with his stepdad. And then of course, my dad is also dead.

What I WANT to say is: Mr FT and Ms. FT invite you to come share in the celebration of our marriage on April 24, 2016 at 12:00 p.m. at place. (Or something similar.)

Not sure though if that is the "proper" wording, especially now that over half of it is being funded by mom/aunt/grandma.

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I got halfway home tonight and realized I left my phone at my desk. So turned around to get it - What a nightmare! At one particular light where I was trying to turn left, I sat through FOUR rounds of lights!

By the time I got my phone and was on my way back home, it was getting late - I was worried I would miss R at the church (wanted to ask her about her daughter doing photography.)

So I decided instead of going home and getting something to eat, then going to the library (to drop off the now overdue DVDs) and then to the church - I would stop at Walgreen's and pick up something to eat, then go on.

That's what I did. Spent $2.93 on a payday bar, york patty and a big thing of sparkling water. Then I got to the church, and R was nowhere to be found. Ugh.

I had also planned on printing out the labels for the church library books - my printer isn't working that great. (It prints, but not great quality.) My friend C is introducing me this week as the church librarian .. had kind of hoped to get some more books PUT in the library before hand.

Oh well ... right?

Going to try to get to bed a bit early tonight.

10 Responses to “I Think I Get How Weddings are Stressful ...”

  1. ceejay74 Says:

    What about something vague like "Mr. FT, Ms. FT and their families are pleased to announce ..." That way giving your family credit for their contributions without calling out the fact that NE has lost most of his.

    It's been said before, but I wouldn't worry too much about the right or wrong way to do things -- just do it the way that feels right to you and fits your situation and values.

    Hope everything works out with the date and your uncle!

  2. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    I like that Ceejay! Thank you!!

  3. MonkeyMama Says:

    I imagine it's extra stressful with trying to co-ordinate so many "long distance" schedules. Hang in there!

  4. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    Thanks MM.

  5. Livingalmostlarge Says:

    Don't worry it'll all work out in the end.

  6. creditcardfree Says:

    I think they can be more stressful if you have less time. Unless you go really, really simple.

    I would write the invite how YOU want to say it. Ceejay's idea is a great one, too. Smile

  7. CB in the City Says:

    My son and DIL did a lovely thing on their wedding programs, and acknowledged family members who had passed, as "being here in spirit and in our hearts." Or something like that. That might be nice to recognize Mr. FT's family.

    I think it's perfectly okay to word the invitation the way you mentioned.

  8. laura Says:


    When I married (eons ago - 25.5 years), I had divorced and remarried parents. We worded ours, "Together with their families, LG and MM ....) It worked out lovely. No regrets. We also acknowledged our deceased grandparents in the program at Mass.

    How exciting! So fun to follow your planning. Smile

  9. Frugaltexan75 Says:

    Thanks all.

    It's funny - mr ft and I were thinking about having empty seats for passed family- maybe have their picture on it. Then at some point in the ceremony we'd place a flower or something. I hadn't figured out the logistics of it yet though.

  10. crazyliblady Says:

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